May the Fourth Be With You

Star Wars: A man in black and a young woman are fighting on an airplane. An electronic dictionary and toaster are ejected from the airplane and land somewhere in the Arizona desert. They end up in a thrift shop where they are found by a random teenager who notices that the toaster is engraved with the name a Mormon hobo… who just so happens to live right outside town! The teen returns the appliances to hobo who, that day, is wearing a tattered Rolling Stones T-shirt. He gives the teen his dad’s slingshot. NOBODY uses slingshots any more.

Empire Strikes Back: That guy in black on the airplane was actually the DAD of the random teen! And had been TRAINED to use a slingshot… by the hobo!

Return of the Jedi: The young girl on the plane was actually the SISTER of the random Arizona teen and the DAUGHTER of the guy in black she was fighting with on the plane! She had no idea!

The Prequels: We learned that ALL Mormons wear tattered Rolling Stones T-shirts. Tattered Rolling Stones T-shirts are THE uniform of the Mormon people. Also, everybody has slingshots. Some use multiple slingshots. Oh, and the guy in black from the plane actually built the electronic dictionary before he was slingshot-trained by the hobo.

The Sequels: A Nutra-bullet lands in the Sahara. It is found by the daughter of the boss of the guy in black who was in the airplane in the first movie.

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